An intimate retelling of my parents’ Indian wedding nearly 40 years ago in their own words. The rituals, the food, the clothes and the thoughts running through their minds on the day.
Archive for the ‘Food’ Category
Ma and Baba’s wedding
Posted in Family history, Food on June 26, 2011| Leave a Comment »
Ma and Baba’s wedding
Posted in Family history, Food, tagged Bengali weddings, Indian weddings, wedding ceremony on June 26, 2011| Leave a Comment »
I went to my friend’s English countryside wedding last week. It was beautiful, simple, romantic and fun. But it made me think of how different Western and Indian weddings are. One is like a roast chicken meal, minimal ingredients, not that many steps but oh so satisfying to eat. The other is akin to a biryani, a sumptuous dish with an army of ingredients and spices, multiple steps in its cooking, waves and waves of exquisite taste but liable to leave you with indigestion.
It also made me think of my parent’s wedding. I have some scant stories and seen a few pictures but it would be so wonderful to take the time to capture the event through the eyes of Ma and Baba. What rituals did they have? What were they thinking? How did they feel? In their own words. So here’s Ma’s perspective on the occasion and then Baba’s thoughts will follow in the next entry.
Ours was a very traditional arranged marriage with each other’s consent. Arranged marriages usually conjure a picture of a practical, well planned affair, devoid of any romanctic aspect. In my experience, far from it. One constantly think of the distant person. The element of surprise and anticipation of falling in love is incredibly romantic.
Before the actual wedding came the the aashisbaad (blessings) where the groom’s side comes to bless the bride usually with jewellery, sari and gifts including sweets and a whole fish, usually a Rohu. Bengal being a river-rich state with abundance of varieties of fish this item has become an auspicious symbol for weddings. Blessings are usually done with durba ( a variety of three blade fine grass) which symbolizes long life and unhusked rice which means wealth. After that the usual feasting. The ceremony really drove home the point that I was really getting married and would be leaving my home which was a part of me for an unknown place. The uppermost feeling was sadness but probably a little excitement as well.
The next part was getting ready for the wedding. As soon as the word spread, the jewelers, the cooks, the sweets makers, decorators and others flocked to the house. Jewellery design was chosen ordered, other necessary arrangements were made, e.g making the furniture etc. which was part of the trousseau. Maa beautifully embroidered and crocheted the bed linens, cheval sets (for dressing table) runners for sideboards, tray-cloths and teacosy covers. It was absolutely amazing how much she did in such a short time. Invitation lists were made. Mejomamu designed a very simple but elegant invitation letter. After a week or so Badomamu with badimami and Chinoodidi and chhotomamu arrived. My three brothers helped maa and baba organise everything. I bought my wedding sari in Kolkata with Suman mami’s help. It was an elaborate red Benarasi with intricate gold work.
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Everyday lamb curry
Posted in Food, Recipes, tagged Bengali, Indian cooking, Indian food, Kashmir, Lamb curry, Meat dishes, non-vegetarian on June 4, 2011| 1 Comment »
You know the question about ‘what would be your last supper?’. I don’t like this question. I find it impossible to answer as I love all kinds of food. How can I limit it to one type of dish? However, if I could have a Top 5, then Ma’s lamb curry would definitely make the cut. I love the taste of the soft, succulent lamb with the rich, smooth and aromatic gravy. Oh and the potatoes. They are a must. They have to be soft and completely soaked in the gravy. Mmm. The recipe below has a Bengali/Kashmiri slant. Ingredients such as the cashew paste, fennel, and the garam masala composition give the curry a more delicate, aromatic flavour versus the spicy lamb curries more commonly eaten. Check out a great book which beautifully describes the history and differences of Indian regional cooking called ‘Eating India’ by Chitrita Banerji. Ok back to the lamb curry.
Ingredients (for 4 people):
- 1 kg lamb (shoulder or lamb) chunks
- Potatoes (waxy), peeled and cut to similar size of the lamb pieces. Dima used to make small cuts in the potatoes for maximum gravy + flavour absorption!
Marinade:
- 150g plain yoghurt
- 1.5 inch ginger, grated
- 1.5 onions, grated
- 4 garlic cloves, grated
- 2 tbsp cashew paste
Other
- 1/2 onion, finely sliced
- 3 tsp ground coriander
- 2 tsp ground cumin (less than the coriander because it has a much stronger flavour)
- 1.5 tsp ground fennel (this is a very Kashmiri touch)
- Chilli powder
- Kashmiri/Bengali garam masala (2 inch cinnamon, 4 green cardamom, 5 cloves, 0.5 tsp nutmeg – all powdered and mixed together)
- 1/5 tsp sugar
- 2 tbsp oil
Pre-prep
– Soak about 15 cashew nuts in milk for approximately 2 hours. When soft, grind them up in a grinder to make a smooth paste
Method
- Marinade the lamb in the yoghurt and the juices of the ginger and onions. Ma only uses the juice so the gravy doesn’t become too chunky and overpowering. Then add the cashew paste. Let the marinade sit for at least 30 minutes. Obviously longer the better and the marinade can be left overnight for more special occasions
- After the lamb has been marinated, add the coriander, cumin, fennel and chilli powder to the mixture
- Heat the oil in a pot
- Add sugar to lightly caramelise for colour and flavour
- Put in the chopped onion. Saute until soft and lightly browned
- Put in the meat. Toss around a couple of times so all the pieces get coated with the oil, onion and sugar
- After, 5-10 minutes, reduce heat and cover with lid.
- Keep checking the softness of the lamb but this should take approximately 1 hour
- Half-way through cooking, put in the potatoes and give it a good stir
- When the lamb is nearly cooked, add a little boiling water if the mixture needs more gravy
- Season and cook for another 15-20 minutes
- Add 2tsp of the gravy and ghee to the garam masala. Mix together and pour over the curry. Stir
- Serve with rice and sprinkle over some chopped coriander and flaked almonds for an added flourish
Bon apetit!
NB: For a low-fat version, make the curry the day before. Leave to cool in the fridge. The next day, the fat will have solidified on the top. Just scoop out the layer of fat with a spoon and there you have it: a lower(ish) fat version of the curry to enjoy.
The sweetest thing
Posted in Food, tagged Alphonso, exotic fruit, food, fruit, mangoes on May 30, 2011| Leave a Comment »
Ahh behold the glorious Alphonso mango! I’ve been at my parents’ place during this bank holiday weekend and when Ma announced that we had some Alphonso mangoes at home, both my sister’s and my eyes lit up. I will also admit to some wooping. Every year we excitedly anticipate the moment when the Alphonso mango season arrives. Just like the British summer, it is short ( six weeks from mid-April to end May) so when the mangoes are here plenty of fanfare ensues. Most people in the West are unfortunately only exposed to the yellow and quite tart mangoes that are neatly sliced up and presented in the little plastic clinical pots for lunchtime by the likes of Pret a Manger, M&S etc.
Alphonsos are on another level. They are the kings of mangoes. When you smell them, even with the skin on, they immediately transport you somewhere exotic. They are vibrantly orange and when ripe have a soft, fleshy and juicy texture. And then there is the taste. So sweet, tropical and just a hint of tartness right at the end. Every different way to eat an Alphonso mango, whether just on their own, in a salad, or as a milkshake is a delight, but you cannot forget the seed. There is something deeply satisfying and basic to suck out the flesh and juice from the hairy seed. This is a compulsory ritual for me but it is not a Japanese tea ceremony. It is messy work. I clutch onto the slippery seed with both hands as I attack it. The juices run down my chin and my forearms as I make sure I get every last bit of the mango goodness. Bring on next year’s season.
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